Feeling really really lousy right now. Felt even worse yesterday. To me, it doesn't really matter how much I mean to you all anymore. It was probably out of pity, that's why. Really felt like running away yesterday, was just totally out of place. I'm not gonna live with the thought that I'm close with you all, that's something that is only true two years ago, not now. Had tiny talks with Gan again today, and Jetaime. A sorry would probably work, but not this time.

I'll stop trying my best to fit in, I just won't.